Monthly Archives: May 2015
Blood and Sex Nightmare 2008
Directed by: Joseph R Kolbek
Starring: Julia Morizawa, Andy McGuinness, Tina Krause
Review by Luis Joaquín González
Ok… Blood and Sex Nightmare (!)… Me, I’m a practical joker and I like nothing more than making my day more entertaining by pulling office pranks. There are a lot of cinema fans in my workplace and what I’ve been doing lately is dropping this title amongst a plethora of others when in the midst of a film conversation. For example if I’m asked about directors I respect, I’ll say, ‘Lynch for Mulholland Drive, Buñeal for El Ángel Exterminador and Kolbek for Blood and Sex Nightmare.’ Or when discussing top movies, my recent choices have been, ‘Scarface, Goodfellas, The Godfather oh and Blood and Sex Nightmare, have you seen that?’ The funny thing is, people look at you like it’s some artsy European classic that they really should know about. I’ve even had workmates pretend they’ve already watched it. Try it next time you get the chance, you’ll thank me after….
Anyway, so in reality this tin-pot slasher is pretty hard to find much information on, but it was one of a number that crept out towards the end of the noughties and attempted to mix slasher action with softcore porn. It’s similar in a way to Porn Shoot Massacre, Massacre at Rocky Ridge and the like, but at $3000 for a production budget it’s a damn site cheaper even than those pocket-money entries.
It tells the tale of a boyfriend who wants to make-out with his girl, but the chances of that happening seem even less assured, because she’s just returned from her father’s funeral. In a bizarre move, he offers to take her to an adult (sex) retreat for a weekend and even though she’s not really comfortable with the idea, she tags along out of fear of him leaving her. Little do the pair know that the site is the home of a deranged zombie/ghost that likes to slaughter visitors and torture them sexually.
I respect the fact that my readers, you beauties, are smart enough to know that Blood and Sex Nightmare (costing $3000) is not going to redefine the genre. So keeping in mind that we’re well aware already that it’s trash, we can begin to look at it a bit more objectively. What I mean is, we can define the level of its trashiness and measure it up against other such titans of the trash basket.
To be fair, the cheap grainy SOV footage, a creepy sound effect for the killer’s heavy breath and a simple yet ominous score, do give Nightmare a rather gritty back garden tone. Due to the budget (or therefore lack of), it’s filmed with a husky fog around the visuals, so it kind of looks how you’d imagine a snuff film might. When we see the level of the dramatics though, we know that it’s definitely not snuff that we’re witnessing. I doubt that real people moan like their tea is cold whilst they’re being gruesomely mutilated. (Not that I’d know of course). First (and last) time director Joe Kolbek lays his cards on the table right from the start by showing us an unknown man getting his penis chopped off in the first ten-minutes. What follows from there is just under an hour of sex, blood and, well, a nightmare in terms of stylish direction and character definition. I feel stupid criticising the lack of any background on the victims, because Kolbek seems to paddle comfortably in the fact that he’s doing exactly what he set out to do without any care in the world for credible filmmaking. I guess, in a way, we have to take our hat off to him for that.
The only real story elements are based around our lead couple and the struggles that they are facing in their relationship. These parts are surprisingly well written and give our heroine a likeable persona. There are quite a few murders and tonnes of nudity (full frontal too) so at just under an hour, you’ll never get bored. Our killer is a zombie-type guy that wants to be reborn, but in order to achieve this, he needs a virgin, which funnily enough our heroine is. This leads to a tasteless scene in which he masturbates blood over her whilst she lays there screaming. I’m not a fan of stuff like that and I’m not sure who is, but in this movie, it didn’t feel out of place at all. After watching my favourite scream queen Tina Krause get her vagina mutilated, I think I was prepared for anything.
So what’s left to say? Well, not much of note, but the make-up for the killer was actually quite good and the penis chopping scene was uncomfortably realistic. Oh, and, I share my reviews on Facebook, Twitter and up until a while ago on my LinkedIn profile. My boss pulled me to one side recently and said, ‘Look Luis, you’ve got CEOs in your contact list and maybe posting stuff like Sandy Hook Lingerie Massacre is not right for our company profile.’ I’m just glad I stopped it before publishing Blood and Sex Nightmare. It does what it says on the tin…
Blood Slaughter Massacre 2013
Directed by: Manny Serrano
Starring: Matt W. Cody, Michael Roche, Carmela Hayslett
Review by Luis Joaquín González
A film called Blood Slaughter Massacre could only be, in any language, a slasher movie. I’ve written before about the amount of entries that have titles that start with ‘Blood’ or end with the word ‘Massacre’ and here we have a combination of the two with Slaughter (another common term amongst this genre’s features) chucked in the middle for the hell of it. I like the fact that there’s no messing around with this one, you get what it says on the box.
Anyway, the movie had an aura surrounding it throughout its production due to some exciting photos of a killer donning a mask that brought to mind the Tor Johnson one used in Small Town Massacre. That has always been amongst my favourites, because it gave the killer a haunting ‘deranged’ look, which had a similar effect as Michael Myers’ cherub-like Shatner. It was also refreshing to see a film that whilst paying tribute to the classics of the eighties, avoided the ‘done to death’ parody angle. No matter how much I love the genre, I’ve grown tired of watching filmmakers demonstrate the amount of references they can include in a runtime. We’ve moved to a time now where the best way of representing the cycle is by introducing a unique approach and avoiding the need for satire.
Two detectives that were involved in a tough case a decade ago are thrown back into the heart of it when a ruthless killer returns to their town and begins murdering the children of earlier massacre victims. The police are left stumped as the maniac stalks the city, but it soon becomes clear that there’s a method to his madness…
Last week, I posted a review of Camp Blood here on a SLASH above. Even if it is a low budget slasher movie just like this one, there’s a major difference that separates the way the two are presented and received. If you threw, for example, three-million dollars at the production of Brad Sykes’ entry, there would surely be improvements, but not really enough to completely alter the net result. Serrano on the other hand delivers a picture that totally outshines its budget and you can only wonder what he could achieve with that much more funding. I admit that it’s perhaps unfair to compare a campy David Sterling flick with a film that exudes such ambition, but as they share the same sub-genre, it exemplifies my point.
BSM is a true horror movie; and what I mean by that is it sacrifices the modern stereotype of regular attempts at humour to maintain a grisly tone. Like the best slashers, this one rolls out its antagonist in the midst of a dark and compelling mystery. It comes close to crossing into serial killer flick territory with the focus on its investigation, but it works by finding the right balance of the two styles. Our lead persona is something of an anti-hero, (an alcoholic cop), but we can overlook his character flaws because we hope that his heart is in the right place. There is a final girl here, but she’s kept somewhat in the background and doesn’t play the typical central role. The screenwriters have certainly taken a risk by avoiding the structure that’s commonly utilised in more recent films, but what we get instead plays in the most satisfying of ways.
With such a bright spotlight of focus shone upon the story, Serrano needed to develop a constant feeling of dread to keep up the film’s momentum. I’ve already highlighted that the killer looks extremely intimidating in that ghoulish mask, but the director makes the most of his hulking frame and menacing size to add extra trepidation to the kill scenes. Whilst there are a couple of gore shots (a shower murder very similar to the one from The Prowler and a chainsaw slaughter spring to mind), it’s the placing of the bogeyman in each stalking sequence that really delivers the necessary fear factor. He’s up there with the guy from The Orphan Killer as one of the scariest maniacs of the new-age and the director doesn’t waste a chance to make the most of his presence. He butchers a huge amount of victims and his sadistic brutality is extremely threatening. This is one of those films that develops its shocks because it makes you question how you’d react if you were to be placed in the situation that you see unfolding on the screen.
At two-hours and five-minutes, Serrano has a lot of ground to cover and he does so with a plot that may seem slightly convoluted to the lesser viewer. I’m not sure if a further prologue scene was removed late in the production, but I recommend watching the film through twice to understand the synopsis. The lesser actors survive due to solid direction and Serrano pushes his cast to the limit in order to draw the performances that he required. We even get something of a ‘The Departed’ moment during the film’s conclusion and it does succeed in leaving you unsure what’s going to happen next.
We live in a world now where every new production comes with pages of untrustworthy IMDB or Rotten Tomatoes reviews and exciting social media commentaries that build a level of anticipation that rarely proves accurate. I’m pleased to say that Blood Slaughter Massacre is better than I’d expected; – and that is a real achievement. What Serrano has built on a modest budget should set the standard for the slasher films of 2015. It is not a remake and It really is that good… (Serrano is also likely Hispanic)
Killer Guise: √√√√
Camp Blood 1999
Directed by: Brad Sykes
Starring: Jennifer Ritchkoff, Michael Taylor, Tim Young
Review by Luis Joaquín González
I have mentioned Camp Blood a number of times on a SLASH above, but never actually got round to reviewing it. I picked it up back in the early noughties on big-box VHS and it was possibly the first no budget slasher of the new age that I got to see. Since then, I always thought of it as the quintessential example of a bad dime-store take on the slasher template. Over a decade has passed since I last watched it and the genre has seen its fair share of features that were financed on even smaller pocket books. This left me wondering if Blood would still maintain the status that I bestowed upon it on first viewing.
Two couples head off to explore a secluded woodland called Camp Blackfoot. Locals have named it Camp Blood due to the fact that a betrayed husband killed his cheating partner and her lover with a machete before disappearing into the wilderness. Legend states that he still roams the hills and murders anyone that is unfortunate or stupid enough to roam his region…
It was a strange feeling sitting in front of Camp Blood again after so long. Part of me was reminiscing the stack of VHS that I used to trawl through in my room when I’d just turned twenty and the other part was proud of the patience that I possessed to ‘appreciate’ so many turkies. Make no mistake about it, Blood isn’t like a bottle of fine wine. What I mean by that is my ten-year hiatus from exposure to it hasn’t turned it into Halloween. With that said, I did find things here that made me smile, which was most definitely more that I’d expected.
Brad Sykes, for all his obvious signs of amateurism, does understand what people enjoy about slasher movies. It takes less than five-minutes for the inevitable boob shot (what a pairing) and the next sight that we are treated to is a lumbering maniac in a clown mask. The kill scenes are deftly edited considering the budget and for the un-trained eye (i.e. my Mrs), the various splashings of blood and an imposing menace could be considered as generally effective. To give you an example, there’s a sequence that starts dumbly, because our sympathetic hero type guy chases the assailant into the forest when there was absolutely no logic in him doing so (the killer was actually fleeing the scene). Anyway, it results in a fight sequence on a cliff that’s well staged and then we get a smartly crafted gore shot that was surprisingly audacious. There are countless ‘tributes’ to Friday the 13th of course, with the most obvious being the film’s title, which was what Camp Crystal Lake became known by after Jason and his mum’s rampages.
I guess the above paragraph may look like I am about to take back all the mocking things that I’ve said previously about Brad Sykes’ addition to the stalk and slash family. Well in honesty, my experience was less painful than I’d anticipated, but I won’t be adding this to any top slasher lists in the near future. You see, the few bits and pieces that are classic slasher fun are punctured by some of the worst and most bizarre filmmaking decisions I’ve ever seen. We spend what feels like a lifetime in the clutches of a group of poorly acted and whiny campers and when the killer finally turns up and starts chopping through them, we’ve completely lost interest in their plight. Our final girl sinks to levels of rancid dramatics that had me reaching for the vomit bag and the patently cardboard machete can only appear so many times without beginning to look comical. There’s a really good and creepy score that often borders on building a menacing tone, but just when I was about to write a positive comment, something dumb kept happening and I felt like the guy in the picture to my right >>. It’s strange, because Camp Blood includes all the ingredients to become a trash-slasher hit. It’s just that it somehow puts them together awkwardly, like trying to build a flat-pack wardrobe without the instructions. I guess the fact that I had prepared myself for something awful meant that I could better handle the unbelievable levels of amateurism when I put it on this time. I went in knowing that there was going to be a mountain of goofiness, which made it easier than when I initially saw this and had less of an idea of what to expect.
There’s no doubt that Blood was filmed on the smallest of budgets, which was obvious because the same actors were re-used to play different characters with minimal effort to disguise their identities. It was bizarre seeing faces returning to the screen as Police Officers or Nurses when we’d witnessed them get slashed just moments earlier(!) I’m sure that back in the day, I noticed this stuff and found it easy to criticise, whereas now I kind of appreciated the cheesiness, if that makes sense. In my opening paragraph, I called this the quintessential example of a bad dime-store take-on the slasher template. Whilst I stand by that statement, I feel now that I can add the word ‘fun’ before bad in that statement. Either I’ve developed a sense of humour over the past decade or I’ve just got used to sitting through so much worse. At least this one has its heart in the right place. So yeah, as discussed, Camp Blood is a (fun) bad dime-store take-on the slasher template
Killer Guise: √√√√
The Boogey Man 1980
Directed by: Ulli Lommel
Starring: Suzanna Love, John Carradine, Ron James
Review by Luis Joaquín González
Money… When Lennon and McCartney wrote that it couldn’t buy you love, they were wrong. It can purchase pretty much everything and it’s the backbone to most of the experiences that we come across throughout our lives. The slasher boom of the eighties was not because Halloween received a four-star review from Roger Ebert. It was, quite simply, a response to the bundles of cash that Carpenter and Co transferred to their bank accounts after its surprising success. That’s not to say that there weren’t filmmakers that were inspired by that movie, but somewhere lurking in the background was the hunger that most humans are born with… The ravishing lust for cash.
I say this, because of all the Halloween imitators that hit screens during the peak years, none looked more single-minded in their effort to become a cash cow than this one. A friend of mine owns a small bar and I remember when I was about eighteen (and foolish), I filled a glass with a bit of everything in order to invent a brand new cocktail that he could call his own. It tasted like cat’s urine, but drinking more than one and a half of them would result in you being absolutely span-dangled. The Boogey Man is a lot like my brazen attempt at a phenomenal new beverage, because it takes parts of many popular horror films and chucks them into a blender in the hope that it’ll appeal to every ticket buying horror fan in the stratosphere. Does it result in a smooth blend of slasher-holic heaven or are we in for more feline-urine…?
A mother returns to the house where she was raised to overcome psychological demons that have haunted her since one fateful night twenty or so years earlier. Her mother’s boyfriend was abusive to her brother, which resulted in him stabbing the elder man to death. Somehow, her arrival awakens the spirit of the deceased villain that was trapped, supernaturally, in a mirror. Unbeknownst to them, they take the mirror with them to help with her rehabilitation and the evil awakens…
If that plot description seems somewhat peculiar to you when compared to other eighties Halloween clones, then you can be proud of your stalk and slash knowledge. The Bogey Man’s unique slant was in danger of not really knowing what it wanted to be, but in fairness, the net result just about works. Haunted house stories always seem to generate chills, which is likely because ghostly urban legends were what we heard the most whilst growing up. Thanks to a smart use of sound and an unnerving Halloween-alike score, we get the right kind of spooky atmosphere to maximise that fear-factor. The slasher homage is most visible when the killer strikes and these regular murders add gore and brutality to the concept. After the traditional cut and pasted Carpenter-esque POV house stalking shot, Lommel manages to implement a few of his own ideas into the direction and the odd one pays off. I thought the scenes that saw characters exploring a dark barn and discovering corpses were exceptionally filmed and there’s always a subtle undercurrent of dread.
It’s tough to make out what got The Boogey Man added to the DPP list and banned in the United Kingdom, although there’s quite a bit of tacky goo and shots of a child – and later his sister – being tied up in a suggestive manner. Like many former video nasties though, this picture doesn’t seem particularly gruesome in comparison with others that it shares its genre with and it was likely a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I’ve read reviews that criticise the level of the dramatics, but personally, I really didn’t think the cast were that bad. Uli Lommel’s beautiful wife, Suzanne Love, had some strong moments as the heroine and her real-life brother was cast to play, well, her brother in a role with minimal dialogue. The fact that he’s mute (and also a bit creepy) made us believe that he was set to be the villain, but it doesn’t take us long to realise that isn’t the case. In fact the film never really clarifies who or what the antagonist is and it’s these parts that show a weakness in the screenplay. It’s hinted that the mother’s evil boyfriend has reached out from the beyond to seek revenge, but without giving anything away, the conclusion throws so much at us that we’re left scratching our heads. There’s a reason why I think this to be a strategic picture that’s targeted mainly to make a profit; and the Amityville-alike house where the action takes place, Exorcist-lite conclusion and aforementioned Halloween-style murders are enough evidence to justify my accusation.
Still, The Boogey Man does provide some neat shocks and when it sticks to what it does best, it’s actually a compelling and scary film. Lommel pulls enough tricks to sustain a morbid tone and despite bordering on being ‘too supernatural’ in places, I think it is a good addition to the slasher catalogue. Those questioning whether it’s truly a stalk and slash movie can take comfort in the fact that it most certainly is; even if it is one that pushes the boundaries. On a side note, Blood Sisters, Girls School Screamers and more recently, The Inherited, could all be considered as inspired by this. With Screamers, it was of course unintentional, but interesting all the same…
Killer Guise: √
Friday the 13th VI: Jason Lives 1986
Directed by: Tom McCloughlin
Starring: Thom Mathews, Jennifer Cooke, David Kagen
Review by Eric LeMaster
Well… hello again!
When I was a kid, I never went to summer camp. I had a few opportunities to go to a local Christian camp called “Camp Nathaniel”, but never tried to complete the Bible-themed workbooks required to guarantee free attendance. When I was confirmed into the Episcopal Church in April of 2009, the ceremony was held at a camps and conference center in (very) rural East-and-South-of-Central KY. Having already been a fan of slasher movies, I was VERY happy to be there.
I have been there many times since, but this first experience of an overnight stay during this first time gave me the “feel” I needed to truly appreciate the “forest” slasher. While I (previously) never cared for Slashaway Camp, I soon realized why it became a classic. Friday the 13th movies moved much closer in rank to my beloved Halloween movies.
Anywho– Friday the 13th Part 6: Jason Lives:
After Tommy Jarvis (Corey Feldman) “killed” Jason in Part IV, and after Tommy (then John Shepherd) confronted a “different” Jason in Part V, Tommy (now Thom Matthews) takes a fellow escapee to a grave yard in Crystal Lake (Now “Forest Green”) to ensure that, once and for all, Jason is truly dead. When lightning strikes a metal fencing sphere that was stabbed into Jason’s body, Jason is revived and returns to bring havoc upon his home turf!
Part 6 introduces Tony Goldwyn in his first role. He dies very soon in the movie, but it’s nice to see such a respected and recognizable face in the film. Other notable actors and actresses who appear are Renee Jones (from Days of Our Lives), Tom Fridley (nephew of John Travolta); and Jennifer Cooke (from V, and Guiding Light), as Megan, our “final girl.”
Writer/Director Tom McLoughlin does a fine job at creating atmosphere and great humor– something that has developed a love/hate relationship amongst fans of the franchise. The movie was well-shot, and the actors and actresses involved were very talented; in fact, their on-screen cohesion is among the best I’ve ever seen amongst the cast in a slasher.
The MPAA required a number of scenes to be cut from the film (What’s new?); but, regardless, it plays well as a result of good editing. Sissy’s death scene was removed completely, the backbreaking scene in the cemetery was originally longer, and the Tommy/Jason fight was trimmed.
Also, the soundtrack was quite good, and with a lot of tracks from Alice Cooper. He’s Back (Man Behind the Mask) was made into a music video featuring Jason stalking a theatre, and was popular back in the day. Teenage Frankenstein was also featured on his popular Constrictor album.
I really have nothing but good things to say about this entry. If I had anything bad to acknowledge, it would be that there are times when the dialogue can seem a little over the top: Tom Fridley’s (Cort) excessive uttering of “This is great!” comes to mind…
Regardless, I give the film a 4 1/2 out of 5 starts. Part 6 is, for me, the best entry into the Friday the 13th franchise, and one of my favorite slashers of all time– second only to Halloween 4, the movie I previously reviewed.
As a side note– as an autograph collector, I had the great opportunity of having friendly contact with Tom Fridley, who I find to be an all-in-all awesome guy. It’s always great when I can collect from the actors whose work I have so enjoyed!
Luis’ view: Also one of my favourites of the series, Part VI stands apart because it successfully blends some gooey ‘action horror’ with a satirical ability to poke fun at itself and its franchise predecessors. I still believe it to be one of the slickest and easiest to watch of the series, but it perhaps lacks the haunting tone that was so successful in part II. This was one of the first slasher movies I ever tracked down and I remember having a youthful crush on Jennifer Cooke. On top of having a feisty heroine, I also liked the soundtrack, which included Felony from Graduation Day. It’s a shame Tom McCloughin didn’t return to the franchise/genre. Whilst it is a treat to watch, it was perhaps the first Friday to have a cartoonish ‘popcorn’ feel. This is something that the series never really recovered from and I would say Part IV was the last truly scary entry. Four stars from me..
Killer Guise: √√√√